PSLS BECAUSE GAY

[filetofish]

[no icons, many SPOILERS for trails of cold steel/sen no kiseki. there's also a lot of gross shit so watch your step.]

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[reanbeanmachine]

[He listens. He's a good listener. Taking in all of Crow's words and thinking about them, turning them over. He looks a little embarrassed at the praise regarding his ability to tell off fate, but he doesn't interrupt. He's quiet for a little while, considering.

It feels like Crow is... He doesn't know actually. That's what's bothering him. And he wants to know.]

I guess if you mean am I going to ignore last night, yeah. But that's not bad, I think. I just want to know what you want. I still want to know what you're thinking all the time. And how long you've wanted to kiss me. And I want to know where you want this to go, too.

I like you. I thought about it last night and all day. I really really liked kissing you. And I like spending time with you. Last night, when you weren't home, it was actually really lame but I was pretty panicked until I tracked you down, probably more than is normal.

This is all really new, I mean, to me in general and between us especially. So it's not like we have to decide everything right now. We can take things a bit at a time.

But we should figure out, um, what direction we're taking them, I guess?

[filetofish]

Eeh... That's really up to you.

[Alright, Crow. You can do it. Just tell Rean what you're thinking. This should be way less intimidating than pulling off an assassination or faking your death or fighting in a war or actually dying... but it's not. Part of him would rather leap back to his death than have this conversation, but after all Rean's done for him he supposes he at least owes him honesty. He'll just do his damndest to make it sound like he's not that invested.]

You're the one it's new to. I've been thinking about it almost since we met, after all. I'd have been perfectly happy to go all the way last night, but I know you're the romance and courting kinda guy. I'm surprised you returned it at all, actually...

[reanbeanmachine]

That long?

[Rean Scwarzer, war hero, Awakener, leader of Class VII. Thick as a brick.

He scratches his cheek, then turns to look at Crow.]

I'm not dead, you know. And you're really attractive. But even so I wouldn't have kissed you back if I didn't want to.

[He may be in his early twenties and have never dated anyone but he's also not desperate? He's the kind of person to whom this all means a lot, so he's never minded taking his time and waiting for someone he can be absolutely serious about.]

I mean, if I weren't interested I'd be telling you right now. But... I'm not doing that, because I just said I like you. I just...

....

I need to know how serious you are, I guess. I don't want to just be a fling for you--and I don't think you'd treat me like that, but I just really want to be on the same page. If we just talk everything out I really am sure we'll work it all out somehow or other.

[As friends, as more, whatever happens, he's a big believer in talking.]

[filetofish]

You're such a dweeb.

[Crow sighs, sitting up and bracing his hands on his knees. Having Rean say he's hot is nice. The idea that this could be a relationship is nice. But he's getting that sense of being an impostor again -- he doesn't belong here. There's no reason for this. It shouldn't all work out.

But they're friends. Classmates, Rean would have said back then, and there's only so much lying a man can do. He's telling himself over and over "you owe him, Crow Armbrust".]

Y'know, I wouldn't be here if not for you. Not just because you saved my life, or brought back my memory, or chased me all that time, but... because you made me want to see my own future. This'll probably piss you off, but I feel like I owe you more than I could ever possibly pay. I don't have anything anyone would want, but I have myself, so if I could give that to you... But I didn't kiss you because I owe you or anything.

[Hahahaha not even a little... No that's definitely an element and the awkward laughter is a tell, but that's far from the main reason, which is:]

I just always liked you, even if you're a dweeb. I know, whatever I'm chasing myself in circles about, I never have to doubt you. And honestly, I have no clue what I want to do with a future, or if I really even want one, but I do know that if I'm going to stick around, it's you I want to stick to. I'm not really the kind of guy to go on about the stars in your eyes or cheesy stuff like that, but... eh. You can extrapolate on your own. I'm just telling you, I'll follow you wherever you go, whatever you want to do. And to be honest I'd be in your bed in half a second if you just snapped your fingers. It's dumb, but... when it comes to you, I'm not joking.

[reanbeanmachine]

[He's blushing again as Crow talks, taking a deep breath at the end.]

It's a lot isn't it?

[A lot to consider. A lot of feelings. Complicated. But they're talking now so that's good, they'll untangle this in no time if they keep at it.]

For the record, if you borrow mira from me I'll definitely charge you ten times the interest of last time. But... When it comes to chasing you down, that was pretty much all for myself. I refused to let you go because I didn't want to, so you don't have to feel like you owe me for me doing something I was doing despite you rejecting my meddling. I'd do it again, too, even if you told me not to. You're already stuck with me, you don't have to feel obligated on top of that, you know?

[But then there's the rest to address, and he looks down at his hands and then up at the sky and he doesn't feel his cheeks getting any less pink. Oh well.]

It's not like that's not... I mean. [Crow in his bed sounds nice, Rean has a normal sex drive he's just abnormally... Considerate and serious.]

Look I don't know what I'm doing. With any of this. But I know I like you, and if you're serious about this, I want to be--[an item? Lovers? Boyfriends? He gives up on the word for now.] Together.

But since I really haven't dated before, I want to take it slow too. I need to figure this out and you're going to have to help. And talk to me more, like this. It's a bit scary but also exciting, and I know if we just talk things out it'll work out.

[And maybe if he's not stressing about Rean so much Crow will eventually develop a passion for something else again. But one thing at a time.]

So, um, I guess this is basically... Would you like to go out with me, Crow?

[filetofish]

...

[There's that blank look again. Not sad this time, just... Really. Why did he have to fall for a guy who likes to take it slow? He watches Rean's face for a moment, then sighs.]

If you insist.

[But he's not going to stop feeling like he owes Rean anytime soon. And he's not going to stop being thirsty. He is however going to mostly behave for now. He does flop over though, putting his head in Rean's lap and his feet up on the arm of the bench.]

I guess I knew what I was getting into.

[reanbeanmachine]

[We can only savour cute domestic dating build up once, Crow! And Rean intends to savour it. And also mildly panic a lot, probably. HOW DOES DATING WORK HE'S NEVER DONE THIS BEFORE.

He takes a deep breath and looks at Crow on his lap. This is already way hot and heavier than he's emotionally prepared for but then again they started at making out. It all seems backwards?

Rean is definitely the kind of guy that would take three months to work up to holding hands, if left to his own devices.

Speaking of hands he doesn't know where to put his. Normally if Crow draped on him he'd just lean back on his hands but like, now they're dating officially it feels different but he still doesn't know where. To put. His hands.

Save him.]

I guess... That makes us boyfriends now. Haha... Sorry it's a little surreal I guess. It needs to sink in.

[filetofish]

Oh, yeah? I'd say I'm surprised by how easily flustered you are, but that's part of your charm, isn't it sweetie?

[Now whose turn is it to be terrorized? That's right, Rean's. Crow's just lying in his lap making eyes at him and grinning.

This is more his element. Let's stop talking about serious things and move on to stupid things!]

[reanbeanmachine]

Crow...

[The serious things do seem to be resolved for now. So Rean is groaning in flustered embarrassment. Not that that doesn't make his chest tighten and his heart skip a beat.]

You're not going to go even a little easy on me?

[Newsflash, he's already holding back, Rean.]

[filetofish]

You wouldn't survive if I went hard.

[It's definitely already going easy. Like reaching up to boop his nose instead of saying embarrassing things really loud until the neighbors are scandalized.]

[reanbeanmachine]

[He sighs and then...smiles. A soft happy smile looking fondly down at Crow. Wow. Gosh. He's actually dating Crow now?? It's all so sudden and it doesn't seem real yet.]

I guess I just have to keep trying to catch up to you.

[In school Crow was ahead in helping people, and ahead of Class VII as C, and then as Awakeners Rean was still playing catch up. It seems like he's always chasing Crow somehow, so maybe this is more normal than he thought.]

I should be used to you being ahead of me by now.

[filetofish]

Oh, I'll keep you on your toes til the day you die. Trust me.

[Cause of course he intends to be at Rean's side for that long. He was intending that already.]

[reanbeanmachine]

I'm looking forward to it.

[He really genuinely is. Just, with Crow maybe at his side from now on?? But hearing that is really inspiring, because it means Crow is planning to not vanish on him.

He finally decides to be brave with his hands, gently and almost cautiously sliding one into Crow's hair. It feels thrilling?? But he asks immediately;]

Is this okay?

[filetofish]

["Is this okay" -- a hair touch? Rean, you're killing him.

And yet it actually feels more embarrassing than something sexual. It's soft and intimate and he can't help getting a little flushed.]

Yeah. I'm just thinking... half of Class VII's going to have my head.

[reanbeanmachine]

[You signed up for the slow death by virgin yourself, Crow. Enjoy five million years blue balls.

Rean is taking advantage of his new lease on HAIR TOUCHING(lewd) by starting to gently pet Crow. This is really nice, but definitely has his heart going.]

Huh?

[Is his response to that though. Yep. Dating for five minutes has not magically cured him of being dense.]

[filetofish]

...

[Siiiigh. Of course Rean's a dummy.]

I should have known. I'm far from the only one into you, you know. I wouldn't be surprised if they all are.

[reanbeanmachine]

You...

[He's going to accuse Crow of pulling his leg but Crow seems kind of serious.]

...You are joking, right?

[filetofish]

Not remotely. You're smart, but you're really thick as a board...

[reanbeanmachine]

Maybe you're just misreading it?

[He's not going to accuse Crow of not knowing what he's talking about but, come on. That can't be right.]

[filetofish]

I'd bet more than 50 mira they'd all kill to trade places with me right now.

[And he is so smug about it.]

[reanbeanmachine]

[He lifts his free hand to hide the sure blush covering his face.]

Crow...

[If that's true he's going to die.]

[filetofish]

Hey, if you didn't want them all to fall for you, you shouldn't have been so charming.

[reanbeanmachine]

I don't ever remember being charming!

[He protests, dropping his hand. He looks vaguely horrified. Not like deep bad horror just. Even if he's still not sure Crow is right what if it's true. I mean it seems impossible but what a thought. He'd die.]

You can't be telling me other people like me like that like it's not news, I literally just started dating you ten minutes ago, Crow!

[Now he's huffing. Calm down Rean!]

Even if you were right it doesn't matter.

[filetofish]

[Crow obviously finds this hilarious. He's laughing his ass off, but he's also staying in Rean's lap because duh.]

I can't believe you really didn't notice any of them! I mean, Laura's probably as clueless as you but Alisa?

[reanbeanmachine]

Alisa is my friend. They all are. You should know, you're part of the class.

[He protests?? Look he's. He's dumb.]