[Please End] Crow Armbrust ([personal profile] filetofish) wrote2018-04-27 01:15 am

PSLS BECAUSE GAY

[no icons, many SPOILERS for trails of cold steel/sen no kiseki. there's also a lot of gross shit so watch your step.]
reanbeanmachine: (02)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-27 07:20 am (UTC)(link)
[It's been... An interesting few years, chasing Crow around, living his own life with that goal in mind. Having achieved what he set out to do is almost surreal, but he's not unhappy, on the contrary. Now that he's got Crow back, now that the whole of their class is healthy and happy and where they individually want to be, he's more determined than ever to make sure they all keep having the chance to live their lives as adult members of society in the way they each see fit. Naturally he also now has students to worry about too, but that's another matter.

One he's setting aside when he comes home to be greeted in a way that's now routine, a familiar tease from the guy he spent the last few years stubbornly pursuing. But now he knows Crow better, he isn't as fooled by the irreverent cheer.

Maybe. He still has a hard time reading Crow some days, and he can't claim to be a mind reader. Rather, he thinks he understands that Crow isn't unhappy, but he's also half acting for Rean's sake, and maybe for his own. He doesn't think there's a point in pushing it, anyway, if this is what Crow needs to feel normal.

Even if it's sometimes frustrating. It feels like distance he doesn't like with someone vitally important to him, but at the same time he keeps coming home and Crow keeps being here to greet him. No matter how frustrated he gets, that alone is enough to lift his heart. Every time he leaves a part of him is always anxious that he'll come back and Crow won't be there.

So even though the greeting makes him roll his eyes and sigh it also makes him smile just a little. Just because it's Crow. And that still amazes him.]

I'm not going to dignify that with a response. Dinner smells great though.

[The second part is said from right behind Crow, Rean suddenly standing behind him, leaning over his shoulder to smell the stew. He's close enough to feel the warmth of Crow's back against his chest but he's not actually technically touching him.]

Fish again, huh?
reanbeanmachine: (01)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-27 08:15 am (UTC)(link)
That's true. You are.

[He wasn't complaining. Crow cooks fish well. Which is convenient because Rean still likes to catch fish. He mutters an "ow" when elbowed, stepping back to give Crow domain over the kitchen again.

He likes being close to Crow, not that he thinks about it much. He doesn't think about being elbowed and laughed at either, because he's kind of dumb even still.]

I won't mess up your cooking, I promise.

[But there are things he had been thinking about. Like how it's been three months and Crow hasn't once mentioned what he wants to do with his life now. Rean doesn't mind if Crow wants to live here and cook for him forever, honestly. Selfishly he'd really like that, but he didn't drag Crow back into his life so Crow could get away with not pursuing new dreams, and he's starting to worry.

He'll bring it up after dinner, maybe. Because his stomach decides to growl, loudly.]

Sounds like a terrible recipe. Let's stick to fish.

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-27 09:08 am (UTC)(link)
[His fingers brush Crow's when he accepts the bowl and he smiles. The table is more civilized, but the couch is fine now and then so he joins Crow amiably, sitting with him and tucking into the meal with enthusiasm.

It's nice, being like this. He really can't get over how it doesn't seem quiet real, having Crow back. He hasn't considered or noticed it, but it's definitely part of his drive to be closer, close enough to touch now and then, affirming reality, that this isn't a dream.]

This is really good.

[Another compliment, sincerely meant, as he devours dinner sitting next to the guy he wasn't sure he'd even see again, sometimes.]

You could probably start a restaurant with recipes like this.

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-28 01:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Easily. Though it doesn't have to be a restaurant.

[He sets his bowl, pretty much empty, down, and turns to face Crow on the couch. His knees brush Crow's thighs and he's too close in general, but his expression is general Rean sincerity.]

You may act like a slacker but it's not like you can actually claim you're not one of the most hard working people I know. It's no wonder you were always asleep in class, not only were you leading the ILF but you were helping everyone behind the scenes all the time. Honestly when I think about it, the amount you accomplished while convincing everyone you weren't doing anything at all is kind of insane.

I know your dedication is impressive, when you want to do things. So if there's anything you want to do, now, I want to help this time. I've been meaning to bring it up, once you had a break. And I'm not saying you have to decide right now, or that your goals have to be as grand as revolution this time. But I don't want you to feel like you're stuck here because of me. Instead, I want to help you achieve whatever it is you next decide to do, big or small, it doesn't matter as long as it's something you want. If you'll let me.

[Part of him is still inclined to panic a little at the idea of Crow leaving the house of course, but...]

Anyway, it's something to think about. You can take all the time you need, but I just want to put it out there that I'm here whenever you decide on something. And I don't plan to let you out of my sight anyway.

[Half joking. But only half.]
reanbeanmachine: (01)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-28 11:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Well it's not like I dislike how things are.

[Rean admits easily. He's only embarrassed by other people being sincere, he's immune to getting embarrassed by his own personal brand of emotional terrorism. Which one of these two is the real terrorist?]

I just don't want you to feel like you don't have options. Whatever you eventually settle on, I'll be here with you for it. And I want to be part of whatever future you decide on, too. In some way or another, that's non-negotiable.

[Look it sounds like a proposal said with lightness, but he's just thinking about how he refuses to not be part of Crow's life the same way he would refuse not to be part of any of class VII's lives. Well, maybe not exactly the same way but that is a vague feeling he hasn't figured out for himself entirely.]
reanbeanmachine: (02)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 12:34 am (UTC)(link)
[He's also used to people blushing at his sincerity so while Crow blushing is surprising, in a nice way, he doesn't think too much of it. Except that he must be on the right track.]

If you're getting embarrassed that means I'm on to something here. Seriously though, don't think I'm going to let you off the hook now after everything. I said you can take your time deciding what to do, but you're definitely not getting out of talking about it with me when you do have ideas.

Letting you off on your own is never a good plan, youd probably go thinking you don't want to impose on me out anyone else any more, or get in trouble.

[He's teasing a little.]
reanbeanmachine: (04)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 12:53 am (UTC)(link)
Aw, and I was just getting to talking about a wise upperclassman giving me the advice to always look after my friends. Well, next time.

[He's full teasing now, gentle and happy. Crow's answer is accepted, and that's good enough for now.]
reanbeanmachine: (03)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 01:29 am (UTC)(link)
[That actually panics Rean for a minute. Coming home to an empty house when he's gotten so used to Crow's dumb greeting is alarming. More so when he doesn't find a note. All kinds of scenarios frolic through his head, from revenge kidnappings to Crow leaving on his own. His heart wrenches, and he sits at the table after checking the house a second time for a sleeping or dead body.

Breathe.

He forces himself to calm down. All these scenarios are ridiculous. Crow probably went out shopping or something.

Feeling both ridiculously overprotective and still worried, Rean calls Crow's ARCUS, silently praying with every ring that the next one will be replaced with Crow's voice.]

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
[He's gonna die.

After no answer for a while he chooses his ARCUS. Maybe Crow's in a spot with bad reception? They're shouldn't be anywhere like that in Trista but...

How ridiculous is it to start a manhunt right now? On the other hand, assuming this isn't innocent, how much time would he waste leaving it?

He's going to drive himself nuts sitting around. So he gets up and heads back out into town. Time to start talking to literally everyone and checking literally everywhere.

The question is does he find Crow or is he a step behind.]

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 02:13 am (UTC)(link)
[When he walks in the door and sees Crow the wave of relief is strong. It hits him harder than he realized. And for a minute he just stands in the doorway, watching Crow drinking and laughing.

It's a good scene. It twists his heart in a good way. Nostalgic. And with the sheer weight off his shoulders from just seeing Crow he feels suddenly very tired. But happy. He enters the bar and slides himself into the company with a smile, letting himself get passed an alcoholic drink as he sits next to Crow.]

How are the games going?
Edited 2018-04-29 02:13 (UTC)
reanbeanmachine: (01)

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 02:54 am (UTC)(link)
[Being leaned on is nice honestly. Especially when it just reaffirms Crow is real and still here. Rean smiles and takes a sip of his (real adult) drink to hide his relief and nods.]

Sure. Just one round though, I'd like to minimize the damage to my wallet.

[Besides you only get bond points for the first game.]

Phone account switching is hell

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 03:44 am (UTC)(link)
[It's fine they're in a party it's party funds. But Rean is smiling, engaging normally. Maybe even a little more energetic than usual, because of the combination of relief from his earlier panic and the warm feeling of Crow against his side.

The drink turns into two or three, not enough to get totally drunk on but enough to feed the warm feelings.

He orders dinner for both of them at some point and slides a plate at Crow to counter the alcohol. He's barely in his 20s but he's a responsible adult.

This evening out is incredibly fun and warm and he's glad, even if it started with a panic.

And while Rean doesn't seem to realize having Crow plastered to his side is unusual the townspeople sure take note. Not in a bad way but there are some knowing and curious looks that go right over Rean's head.]

[personal profile] reanbeanmachine 2018-04-29 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
[There's a good chance anyone who asks Rean is going to be just indirect enough that he has no clue what he's being asked about and then he'll answer about how great it is that Crow is settling in again and the whole town is just going to feel so sorry for Crow, kind of like how Ymir feels for Elise.

For now, though, he's staring after Crow because for a moment, in the moonlight, with Crow looking at him, he felt his heart skip a few beats.

But Crow is already walking away and acting normal, leaving Rean puzzled but following.]

We did stay out pretty late, huh? It was fun, though.

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